What if there is no end?

Let's go a little deeper from our conversation last week, shall we? We were talking about being worthy of love right now. Getting a little personal for a moment, I notice that a lot of my unworthy feelings come from this idea that some day I'll get there. Like there's a finish line.

This "finish line" idea really hit home when I finished college and got a job. In the field I wanted to work in! In 2008! It was crazy! I'm very fortunate and grateful. Anyway. Point being, I'd literally spent my entire life since I started school working toward that moment. I remember having a panic attack freshman year of high school because I didn't know where I wanted to go to college or what I wanted to do with my life. I had such a strong feeling that there was a right answer and that if I didn't move along an intentional path toward a goal I'd fuck it up and end up somewhere I didn't want to be.

And there I was, 10 years later with my chosen job, having finished college, which I had been fixated on just getting into...and it was like...ummmm...now what?

So I got an MBA. And I shifted jobs to make more money. And I tried to date. And nothing made me feel "done." There was never a moment of "Yep! You're all good now!" Which...duh. Of course not. And also, thank GOD. Because if we're done by at 23 or 27, then WTF are we supposed to do with the next 60-70 years of our lives?

And so I offer: what if you just let go of these "end points" entirely? What if you stop thinking once you lose X pounds, or get Y job, or get married, or have kids, or whatever, you'll be happy? Because when we think of those things as milestones or goals or bucket list items, then our Ego jumps in and is like "you better get that thing done!"

One of my favorite quotes from Abraham Hicks is, "I thought you wanted a ride on the river!" Which basically means that living life, the experience of living life, is about enjoying getting to the goals, not reaching the goals.

So I offer you this week, babe, what if you just enjoy not knowing how it will work out, and instead know that it will work out at some point. And that getting there is literally what this life is for?



© 2019 by Libby Meis

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